It's Raining

It's raining. I find myself mad. Mad that I would put this off till the last day. The one project I actually enjoy doing now having to do it in the rain puts a sort of disappointment inside me. For some reason, all the school projects that I enjoy or would actually like to do, I end up doing them at the last minute. That doesn't make sense to me. With that in mind I headed outside trying not be too annoyed with myself. The first thing I ran into where these white little berry looking things. 

Everything was dark and gray around them so they stuck out to me. They almost seemed out of place. It reminded me how I feel out of place sometimes wether it be at school or doing other things. It also made me excited for the future because although I may feel out of place that just means theres somewhere else I belong. I believe that God puts those feelings inside of us. Its almost like a sensor. It helps us (well maybe this only happens to me; im not sure) find what were meant to do or be where we were meant to be.  So although it sucks at times, Im thankful for those feelings because it has helped me time after time this last year in making decisions and choices. As I continued on my walk I realized I was walking down this small path way in the dirt. 

Now I know saying that life is like a path or there are many paths to life is a bit cliche but it reminded me how I am going to step out on that new path in life pretty soon. It worried me a bit that is that I have to decide what path to take. But just like before I knew that the holy spirit would lead me on the path I am meant to travel on. The last thing I came to on my walk was this cement block with moss growing on it.

It seemed like a bad place for anything to grow on but sure enough there was life. I started thinking about how I left this project till the last day again and for some reason my mind gave the moss a personality. I thought to myself "the moss probably didn't know it could grow on cement but it tried and sure enough it grew." I felt kinda retarded first for thinking that the moss could think and second for letting my God given gifts just sit idel. It showed me that although I might be scared of messing up or doing a bad job that God gave me these gifts for a reason and that is to use them for his Glory. Instead of  putting my gifts to the bottom of the list they should be the first ones I do. The ones I try hardest on. The ones I want to grow and develop. I shouldn't just put it off till the end because its easy for me to do but rather do it first to the best of my ability because that what God wants from us. 

Pride is the worst of all sins.

        Have you ever had a crappy day? Maybe you’ve heard that you need more self esteem to feel better about yourself. With a little inward change of mind you can see yourself as the good person you truly are. What is self esteem in reality? Pride. Satan is a mastermind at restyling sins into, what seems like, harmless little packages. He does all he can to get our mind off of others and back on ourselves. Pride is ultimately the root of all our sins.

       

       In Christianity we believe that it is not by our own doing that we accomplish anything of value but God through us, empowering us. As C. S. Lewis stated, pride “..is the complete anti-God state of mind.” I would also say pride is the complete god state of mind too. That is when we are prideful we are disregarding God and putting ourselves in a god state. Pride goes against everything we adhere to and know about christianity. “It was through Pride that the devil became the devil.” Satan will tell you to look inward and have more pride or self esteem when our identity and joy are not within ourselves but within Christ Jesus. Once satan has us in a prideful state of mind he has won his battle and we are no longer thinking outwardly about the things of Christ but inwardly about ourselves.

       Now we could leave it at that and tell you not to be prideful but I think that brings up another problem. As C. S. Lewis correctly stated, “the virtue opposite to [pride], in Christian morals, is called Humility.” So naturally if you're trying not to be prideful then you will do the opposite and be humble. I’ve personally been in this place before and I realized I was prideful so I decided I would try to focus on humility so I could be humble.  The problem with trying to do that is that I was still making it about me. Which is what? Pride. The devil loves to play games with us. He like us to think we're doing the right thing but it really depends on the motives behind your actions. As my pastor said “if you want to grow in humility, don’t focus on humility.” If you get the focus off yourself and back onto others and the things of Christ you will find yourself a more humble person, knowing that you are nothing with out our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.